David Beckham is celebrating; "43 days, 43 days!" he shouts happilly. Posh asks him why hes celebrating.
He answers "Well Honey, I've done this jigsaw in only 43 days."
"And that's good?" asks Posh.
"You bet Hon" says David."It says 3 to 6 years on the box."
Q: What would David Beckham's name be if he was a Spice Girl?
A: Waste of Spice
David Beckham walks into a sperm donor bank,
"I'd like to donate some sperm" he says to the receptionist.
"Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?".
"Yes" replies Beckham "you should have my details on your computer".
"Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. Shall I call Posh Spice for you?"
"Why do I need help?" asks Beckham. The receptionist replies
"Well David, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker...."
David Beckham walks into a pub.
The landlord says 'A pint of your usual, David?'
Beckham replies 'No, just a half, then I'm off'
Its the year 2019 and Romeo Beckham is about to sign professional terms with Manchester United. Pondering the situation, he asks his Father, "What squad number should I ask for dad?"
"Wear four out there Romeo"
Q: What do Barry Manilow and David Beckham have in common?
A: A: They are both f***ing useless singers.
Q: Why is David Beckham like a Ferrero Roche?
A: They both come in a posh box
Q: What's the difference between David Beckham and Posh?
A: Posh Spice doesn't kick back when she's taken from behind.
Q: What do David Beckham and British rail trains have in common.
A: They both go in and out of Victoria
Q: What do the England footbal team and Posh Spice both have in common?
A: They've both been screwed by David Beckham.
Q: Why did Posh Spice marry David Beckham?
A: Because he's the only fella who can lob Seaman at 60 yards!
David Beckham has gone crazy believing Posh has been having an affair on him. In manic rage, he goes out and buys a gun. He rushes home to confront his wife, and finds her in bed with none other than Ruud Van Nistelroy.
Devastated, Beckham takes out the gun and points it at his own head.
"No, David don't do it." Posh cries jumping up from her spot underneath the covers...."I'm sorry and I know we can work this out."
"Shut up and sit back Victoria." Beckham replies. "You're next."
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